As I write this I am still on my very long bus ride taking me from Luang Prabang, Loas to Hanoi, Vietnam. I am struggling to articulate my thoughts and feelings as we move along the bumpy and narrow roads of Vietnam.
My trip started by being dropped off at a bus top where there were 3 buses lined up, one very sketchy looking one that looked like it would break down after about 20K, another ok looking one, and finally a nicer looking one with flashing lights across the front saying Luang Prabang - Hanoi. Thankfully this one was mine :) I thought it was going to be the rickety bus and was like ooooh no this is gonna be a rough go.
The bus is actually quite nicly equipped with A/C and reclining "bed seats" Your feet stretch out in front of you and your back can recline almost so you can lie flat. Better than my buses back and forth to Northern Laos for sure. We set off for our very long journey. One of the toughest parts about the bus is you never know when you will stop so drinking water can be dangerous cause if you don't get a pee break you could be holding it for an awfully long time. Same goes for eating. We have only made 2 stops thus far to eat and we have reached our 23 hour mark of travel. ... 27hours total travel time.
Shortly after we left Luang Prabang we made a couple stops along the road where we picked up a few more passengers.... And when I Say a few I mean about 20. The set-up of the bus is quite different where there are cushions lining the floor under our comfortable seats as well as the aisles. Vietnamese people fit in every nook and cranny of this bus. Each stop we made after this made us feel like we were in a circus car where people just kept filing out- where did they all fit?!? It's been the entertainment of this journey for sure.
I made it through my first land border crossing which went quite smoothly despite never knowing what the hell is reeeeally going on. First we needed to go through the Laos departure hall where they "checked you out" of the country. You then walk across no man's land toward Vietnam where you go through their immigration and they check your passport and visas (which must be arranged in advance). They take your passport and visa and shoo you away....I'm like uuuuh you still have my passport haha. There were a bunch of other white folks around experiencing the same thing so I felt relatively secure that at least we were all in the same boat. All went smoothly in the end with no complications and we were on our way once more.
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A weird and anxious feeling has crept into me as we drive farther and farther into Vietnam. I am not sure what it is or why. I look around and see the valleys of jungle and imagine what the Vietnam war could have been like with guerrilla warfare and agent orange, it seems so terrifying and unreal. And now tourists come from all over to see this country.
As we continue farther the jungle valleys turn into lowlying rice fields depicting that unique green colour only rice fields can posses and yet I still get more anxious. I feel like this is not the place I should be...this unsettling feeling has been with me for a few days now and only intensifying. As I think more and more about this I have come to think that these intense feelings may be reflecting more about my upcoming experience. Often when one expresses or feels such strong emotions it is for a reason...maybe Vietnam will be the place of complete transformation. Maybe it is anxiety of another change and another transition or maybe it is me just getting a little homesick. Whichever it is I am going to try my best to make the most of my time in Vietnam.
...Some of these feelings may be compounded by an email i received mere hours before leaving on this lengthy bus ride. It was from my in-country organization who would be taking care of me for the next 4 weeks in Hanoi during my volunteer placement. They had been notified by IVHQ (the international organization I went through to set up my volunteering) had terminated their partnership and they would no longer be taking care of IVHQ volunteers---- now what the hell am I to do? With no wifi or connection to the outside world my mind is in limbo as to where I will be and what I will be doing for the next 4 weeks....
P.S. (upon posting this entry) All has been arranged and organized for my next placement I have been contacted by IVHQ and have arranged pick-up for tomorrow to take me to my volunteer house
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